Monday, January 6, 2014

from the other side : the dinner

For those of you finding your way from the Medical Monday Blog Hop, welcome!  This is such a fantastic way to find people in the same boat as you.  Because really, not many people really get this strange life of ours unless they have lived it.  Hope to see you around!

Last Thursday, while Kyle's family was in (babysitters!), we were able to go enjoy one of the resident interview dinners.  You know, that casual night where interviewees show up the night before their real interviews, get free food, and get to ask the residents of the program for the scoop.

Kyle and I were the first to arrive at Mellow Mushroom, and so parked ourselves at the bar.  Eventually a few other residents showed up and we were waiting for our table to become unoccupied by its previous tenants.  I was glad to see that Beth, another resident wife, was also going to be there.

When Kyle was interviewing last year, I only made it to one of the dinners... Wilmington, NC to be exact.  I accompanied him to 4 interviews, but I wasn't feeling well for Savannah, wasn't invited to Charleston, and didn't realize I was invited to the one here in Greenville.  More on that here.

Oh how wrong I was... I have come to find out that not only do the residents here show up with their wives, but sometimes they bring their kids!  Hallelujah!

But I digress.

The interviewees began to arrive, there were 5 this time.  I was immediately struck with what I remember the most from the one dinner I attended.  The look on their faces.  They all had it.  It screams a range of emotions and thoughts all at once.  "Please like me!  What am I getting myself into? Are you guys cool?  Don't screw this up!  I hope the food is good.  I'm so tired of traveling.  Am I going to Match here?  Will I want to Match here?  What questions should I ask?  Should I be funny or serious?  Everyone says just be yourself, but what 'self' should I show right now?  Am I allowed to have a beer, because everyone else is, but is this a test?!"

Personally, I was a little worried about being there... how much am I, as the wife, allowed to share?  I mean, I know a lot of nitty-gritty stuff.  What was my role supposed to be?  I looked around... none of them had spouses with them.  Hmm.

I ended up interacting with 3 of the five... solely because they were the ones sitting close to me.  I found out that 2 of them were married... their wives just didn't join them on this interview.  I was able to share with them that the wives here make an effort to hang out officially once a month, but most of us are truly friends and get together more often than that.  I was also able to share with them how much we love it in this city... and how glad I am that MY husband is in this program.

Of the three I talked to, one seemed to be trying a little too hard.  Another made it his goal to ask lots of probing questions, and the other seemed to have mastered the balance of enjoying himself/remembering that this was part of the interview process as well.  Near the end, I came to find out that he knows one of the friends that I have made here, and his wife is hoping they end up at this program.

I hope they end up here too.

Overall, it was a really fun night.  Who knows if any of them will be here next year; that is just part of it with the Match.  I wish them the best; but for me, it was a nice time with my husband and his coworkers.  I was able to watch the pride they have for their program really shine, but not without being mostly honest with the interviewees about the realities of it as well.  It was nice to let loose without having to worry about Myles for a couple of hours, but I am also excited knowing that it is ok for us to bring him along if I want to go to any more of the dinners.

And the pizza was pretty great too.

Since it is Match Season and I am on the other side now, I don't want to leave without giving a little advice for those going through it:  



  1. Thanks for linking up with Medical Mondays! Oh my gosh Mellow Mushroom-someone told me about that and there is one a few blocks from me. Now I have to try it :) Its really surreal to be at the residency dinner not having your husband vie for a spot. I remember the nerves and show some of the guys would put on to impress the chair. How much longer does your husband have in residency? It will go by so fast I swear! We've done 7 years and Im shocked he is finally done in 6 months-it really did fly by. Happy 2014 :)

  2. Lovely post. Visiting from medical mondays. :)

  3. Happy Medical Monday :) I never attended any of the interview dinners, and Kyle has had to work every night they had this this year too, so I didn't attend again. I always wondered what they would be like from each side. I'm sure they appreciated your sweet personality, it probably made them feel so calm and welcome!

  4. Stopping by via MM Blog Hop! Glad to hear you enjoyed the pizza!

    Ray Doc Wife

  5. Thanks for linking up with Medical Monday! Yeah for babysitters, friends, and match season - I hope it brings you some new friends:-)

  6. Wow, that is great that spouses are involved. On my tour, my husband couldn't travel with me and there was only one significant other with the group of us who travelled around for interviews (because they were couples matching. IT would have been nice to have my husband around. It isn't common for spouses to come out to these things where I am. It would be nice, though. I might suggest it for next year.

  7. I never went along to any while Peter was interviewing, but I get to as many of these dinners as I can now. Free food & drinks, plus socialization (since ours are reception style, the other spouses of current residents and I can totally just mingle/hang out on our own!) - I'm in. Nice that you two could get out together!

  8. Sounds like an interesting evening! Aren't you glad you're on the other side of the fence?! And, absolutely LOVE your advice! Thanks for linking up for MM and best wishes for a wonderful 2014!!!

  9. I came across your blog while looking for topics to discuss with other residents/resident's SO during the resident interview dinner. I will be traveling with my husband as he is on the interview trail. What questions should I ask? What topics are usually brought up?


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